Power

Again, I'm back to the personal posts. But I guess the only people that read my blog are the ones that honestly care about my life so it's ok. I trust you'll be nice though darlings!!!

In Sacrament meeting, the talks were about the Priesthood in various capacities in the church. For those that don't know much about the LDS church, we believe in what's called the Priesthood power, which is the power to fulfill the ordinances in our church, everything from blessing sacrament to sealing families together in the temple. It's the governing power over the earth and it is given in various stages to men starting at age 12. With that very brief intro to the Priesthood, this one women was speaking about the Priesthood in the sense of her future spouse (clearly this was a singles ward lol). Much of her message was about how important it was to her that she married a man that honored his priesthood power and that used it to serve others selflessly. The other messages were about how the Priesthood blesses homes and family.

For those friends that know me closely, you'll know that this is a very sensitive topic with me. One of the guys I dated for a very long time in high school left the church and declared himself agnostic. After a lot of contemplating, praying, begging, and heartbreak, we decided to split up. This decision has caused me a lot of heartache and has destroyed my friendships with my ex's family and friends. The next few months were months of a lot of struggling, questioning, and second guessing. But I can proudly say today that I don't regret that decision.

I know without a doubt that I want the Priesthood in my home. This power is what allows me to be sealed to my family for the eternities. This power is what heals me when I'm sick and injured and what calms my troubled heart. This power allows me to be rejuvenated every week and rid myself of what I've done wrong. This power is what helped me survive those months of sorrow through the help of my father, bishop, and home teachers. This power has shaped me and nourished me. I cannot deny myself or my future family of this enabling power that will guide them through their every hardship. I can't deny my children the opportunity to ask their father for a blessing when they're scared to start school. When my children or I are sick, I can't deprive myself of the blessing to call the home teachers or my husband. I can't deny my children the experience of being baptized and confirmed by their father. I can't deny myself the power to seal my family to me not only for this life but for the next life to come, for longer than I could possibly imagine. I can't deny the power of the Priesthood access into my home. And if that makes me stupid that I want my family to be enriched by these blessings, then I'll happily and stupidly take this power.

Sometimes you have to make sacrifices in order to stand up for what you believe in. Never question what you believe in, stand by it through anything. I'm so grateful for the influences of my father, grandfathers, uncles, bishops, and friends for their worthiness in holding and using their Priesthood power. And I'm so grateful for my boyfriend that honors his everyday by serving a mission he is proud of :) The Priesthood is something I will always, always, always want in my life.

Happy Sunday lovelies!